and just read Rachel's newest post. apparently she's in love too. albeit with different people.

i could sing of your LOVE forever

so life's been good, GOD has been good, amazingly, wonderfully mercifully good to me. i am blessed beyond my wildest dreams and beyond my most earnest prayers. so i love my job. i love my colleagues. i am loving the singapore experience (well, discounting being sandwiched in the mrt everyday with pushy aunties. my ability to shoot dirty looks is now so well-honed i think it can actually, very probably kill someone one day).

also, i am loving my newfound Hokkien powers of conversation. what could have been the worst day with 3 non-english speaking patients turned out to be the BEST day. such satisfaction being liberated from the fear of being unable to communicate.

so yeah, life's good. life's a peach. life's a bag of goodies everyday, its schweeet! GOD is amazing is he not? HE turns fears and apprehensions into blessings.

so i know i sound like i'm on moonshine but it really is the happy juice born of gratefulness to GOD. I am blessed by my Father above. apologies in advance for turning into one of those irrepressibly cheerful irritants.

working girl

so here i am in singapore. whoop dee doo. a brand new start, new friends to make. its terribly tedious making new friends, but reminding myself that at 22 i should be excited. I'm not. I dislike looking for new places to shop, to eat. i miss my reliable green grocer, always 5 minutes away on Thursdays and Saturdays. I have my habit, my routine. on the other hand, i am strangely not missing england at all, not one iota. Perhaps its part of my genetic makeup that refuses to allow me to wallow in nostalgia and sentiment.

anyway, work starts on Friday. If I truly believed in symbolism in every event, i would say it signals an end to true freedom, heralding my conformity to what society deems as part of "growing up" and actively contributing to the endless rat race of work. However, i am no such pessimist. I choose to view this as a mere phase in the run-up to Jesus return. Then I can have an eternal holiday with Jesus. yay!

here's praying everything will be alright at work. colleagues fine, patients fine, some eye-candy walking around to liven my day perhaps....sigh. one hopes.

The Onion Law- physically possible.

3 years of mother england is coming to an end. its amazing how a month of travelling around the UK and good company can erase every bad moment in the past 3 years. I cannot recall a single bad moment I've had here (you can be sure there were though!).

Anyway, I will miss the people more than anything else. The fact that they are only a skype call away is small consolation. Separated by a 7 hour time difference in a week's time (8 hours during winter), the word "soulmates" is not exclusive to lovers, it also extends to lifelong friends.

My summary of it is that the Onion Law stands true. People have many layers, like onions. The trick of it is to engage people in conversation because most people have interesting lives, be it a godly or ungodly life. My ability to peel onions (both literally and metaphorically), has improved, although I am regrettably still too quick to stereotype and dismiss people in general. You never know who God arranges you to meet. Case in point- my most enjoyable conversation so far was 2 hours talking to a very intelligent priest during an Irish wedding. On the outside, he looked like a turnip but inside that turnip contained a first-rate brain. If I wasn't seated next to him, I would have immediately dismissed him. Catholic priests are among the most notoriously stereotyped people in the world after all.

I'm so thankful to God for these 3 years, I can truly say His plans are marvellous, bemusing, complex and downright exciting. He has granted me lifelong friends who, although are still not ready for their salvation, yet have been a blessing from God Himself. And my prayer is that God will send more onions worthwhile peeling.

Roll on Singapore!

praise Yah

All glory be to Yahweh, God of my Salvation! First class honours in the bag!

woop woop! Graduation celebration! *opens up a bottle of bubbly*

chapter 3. closed.

I can finally say I am done with university forever. 3 years has flown and I've enjoyed most of it even the exams. woohoo!! now on to making actual money.

now am going to enjoy days of lazing around without feeling guilty or that i should be doing work! what a liberating feeling.

1 month to go till ireland ireland ireland!! woop woop

Graduation ball right after the final big exam. merdeka!

like zoobeer wasn't bad enough

If i ever have a kid or kids, I think I will give them irish names such as the ones below. Just to create a difficult childhood (because we all know that relentless childhood teasing builds character).

For the girl: Ailbhe/Eabha/Clodagh/Aoibheann/Aoife/Niamh

For the boy: Tadhg/Eoghan/Eoin/Diarmuid/Caoimhin

Barmy potato-eating people.

eight

Only 8 more days till permanent freedom from studenthood. I must say I will miss it, but then again, I won't. not the late nights, the working on placements then coming home to work on assignments. nope! soon i will be working and studying but getting PAID for it. hurrah!

8 more days to the start of pretty awesome holidays. ireland, london, scotland etc etc.

sunshine, love and pretty boys will abound!

till then....8 more days of toiling and back ache due to excessive hunching over.

irlande here i come!

W-shaped recession

God is so great to be bringing me out of this "age of austerity" (as the treasury minister so elegantly put it) into a land filled with milk and honey. well, almost. England's inevitable budget cuts and job slashing does not bode well for us about-to-be-qualified,bottom of the cesspool physio students. I am very interested in the new ConLib budget plan to be unveiled tomorrow. the harvest years seem to be over for England, time for the pasties to turn to God.

I hope they pull through it, i sincerely do.

'ello luv

its nice to look forward to steady pay soon. its incredible to know God has blessed me and answered my prayers. truly truly I say, God is amazing and His plans are perfect!

however, now I am going to leave, I cannot help the twinge of regret that I have not travelled as much as I should have. I will definitely need to make the most out of my next 3 months in Mother England! admittedly i have not truly seen the beautiful side of England or Europe (with the exception of france).

hello warm sunny weather and good food again! woop woop. Summer is here!

i so feel like this now..

i so feel like this after dinner just now...

mental spa

i am mentally and physically exhausted. i know freedom is less than 4 weeks away but the whole interviews, looking for jobs, working on exams and being a performing monkey everyday 9-5pm at work is just exhausting. I hate being at the bottom of the cesspool, having to prove myself everyday and pretending I enjoy running errands for people. sometimes i wish had an endless pot of gold so i can get me all the happiness money can buy.

anyway enough whining. this is all building character and part of Yah's perfect plan. less than 4 weeks more, less than 4 weeks more. trusting in God. i think a day at the spa would rejuvenate me.

swimmingly swimmingly

things are going swimmingly swimmingly. having another interview this week hurrah! God is good. AND another 7 more weeks to freedom and travels. yippee yippee.

plus placement has been going well, love the people I work with and there's lots of eye candy on the ward. heh heh heh. always a plus.

GOD is GREAT.

vantage

the future holds exciting things. God is taking me to places I never thought I'd go! like back to SE Asia, perhaps! i'll know in 3 weeks maybe less.

just have to keep head above water for another 10weeks. less than 3 months to travels and the good life! :D yippee

summer is barely here. but already the frenetic buzzing of wings brings back mild sufferings of entomophobia.

building character

only God gives me the strength to survive and maintain my sanity these days. its not only assignments and study that I have to do, its job applications, getting the CV together, prepping for final exam yada yada yada. such is life, but God is my strength and refuge. Amen!

to the root of wha?

sometimes i miss the days of chemistry test papers and addmaths practice. the days of just practising and practising and practising endless questions and MCQs.

i remember the grades i got for addmaths and chemistry. then i don't miss it anymore.

thank God for IFBN

i am fed up. its so nice and sunny outside, practically calling me to take a holiday in the countryside exploring some ruined castle or something. instead i am stuck in smoky, rough salford trying write up 2 assignments and study for placement! gahh!

seems like such a waste of a day when it should be spent wearing dresses and sitting in the sun with nice people. no holiday for me till i finish these assignments.

feeling so unsettled, i still have not found a church that fits, a church that is alive in the Word. there are no messianic congregations around. moan moan, poor me. anyway, enough of the pity party! i am blessed to be here! sincerely.

tear jerkers

for goodness sake. someone has to stop nicholas sparks from writing another "heartwarming" novel. unbelievable but the man has managed to churn out another vomit-inducing piece of drivel that will, i predict, will top the bestseller's list again. Now, i don't normally care about authors and the piffle they write nowadays, but he writes books like "the notebook", "message in a bottle", "a walk to remember" (cue melodious hallmark music). In my humble opinion, they are just plain shite.

He has to be stopped. well, maybe its not his fault. its the "hopeless romantics" *suckers suckers* that ought to be shot for catapulting the man into fame (and earning him a crapload of money). The man has no imagination, the crux of his novels is the fact that the hero/heroine goes through numerous emotional sucker punches, loves, loses and discovers some profound truth about their inner strength. whoop dee doo.

Maybe i should write a heartwarming novel, about a girl inspired by nicholas sparks to change her life forever and embark on a personal mission to rid the world of romantic suckers.

sorry thats my rant of the day. its the stress talking. bring back the days of roald dahl's vivid, naughty imagination.

spuds, yeats & shamrock

its been a tiring weekend. but, i've booked my aer aerann ticket to ireland! ta me sasta! i promise to be enthralled by the soft musical irish lilts and meet many paddys.

it will be a good 4 days attending a wedding and taking road trips with good company.

but another 4 months to that, will have to complete assignments and exams and actually graduate first!

its all coming together!

then they invented the talkies.

Black and white screwball comedies are the best type of comedies there is and ever will be. The Lady Eve 1941 has to be my favouritest screwball comedy ever. Ranking up there with It Happened One Night and My Man Godfrey. They don't make comedies the way they did in the 1940s, goofy, sweet, clean and ever so slightly corny. Henry Fonda is such a dish!

holiday? or not.

Ah, bliss. friday will be the start of a 4 week Easter holiday before the final leg of university begins. I best enjoy it while I can before the madness of job hunting and actual job begins.

But typical to university life, I have so much to do in 4 weeks. 2 assignments, job hunting, job applying (yes even before graduation, we are vying for jobs) and reading up for neuro placement. sigh. looks like it won't be such a wonderful holiday after all. take a chill pill, Zoe, take a chill pill. or a giant valium.

here's to the last few months of university life. I will miss it. But then again, I won't.

that light unto my feet

every time i get anxious about exams and the future, God does something incredible to reassure me that it's all gonna be okay. you'd think God would be tired of such trivial thoughts that He'd box my ears for listening to all the negativity around me. Nah. Today, I heard something amazing that I have done incredibly well in final year (through the grapevine of course). that to me is amazing. the progression from first to final year is incredible, its only God's mercy and grace! what else could it be! certainly not due to this brain of mine.

here's to the final exams and applying for jobs, i will not worry because my God is so big and strong.

Thank you Big Daddy!

(i really like the picture below, with the flashing light because i'm so technologically challenged that i'm still fascinated by moving pictures.)

non verbal communication

its amazing how the power of speech, body language and volubility of a person can influence even the most hostile of audiences. today i sat in a lecture where the former chief physio of Manchester United and current chief physio of Blackburn talked about his job. Now, let me just say, I am not interested in the least in becoming a sports physio. Not now, not ever. But he didn't make it out to be a glamourous world. on the contrary, he painted a real picture of competitive bitchy pansy-assed players and the obligatory domineering manager (couldn't tell if he was referring to his current manager or the former, whats the difference anyway?)

still, i was fascinated. i still wouldn't like to work in any professional sporting club, be it football or rugby league or crown green bowls but the way he carried himself with such confidence, it was enthralling. its like that story "Destination Unknown" by Agatha Christie (she describes with much better flair), where the twisted evil-genius-millionaire practically hypnotises the crowd with the mere power of his words.

The power of motivational speakers, the power of politicians! and the vulnerable weak minds of the masses. fascinating business.

By the way, he graduated from salford uni physio school. another fact: the current Man utd physio also graduated from salford university. so yeah, feeling a teensy bit proud of salford university now, well, maybe just the school of physiotherapy.

note to self: give self a swift kick in the arse each time self gets stressed about the future, assignments and work. self must not have such little faith!

will do, self!

yeah cos i got nothing better to do or say

i cannot believe my life has gotten so drab that i look forward to a comedy evening out next week. just for a chance to laugh at unknown brit comedians. next thursday, 7 days away! can't find anything more interesting to do for the next 7 days. feel like a mindless robot, working and thinking about the next task to do all the time. i am what my life is at the moment. B-O-R-I-N-G.

on a side note, today i am a firm believer that all men should wear suits all the time. this is because today i saw a regular slob turn into a fit, trim looking professional. and i had to think for 5 minutes before i realised i knew this slob. call me a convert, i do believe in the power suit.

the preponderance of liberation over slavery

choices. sometimes i just want somebody to order me around instead of giving me freewill and options! but this is the reward of liberated man, bought with the ultimate sacrifice on the cross. it is up to us to make the right ones with the guidance of the omnipresent Spirit within us.

i am making the choice to cut out all the junk tv that sucks the soul out of me and turns me into a mindless minion via its subliminal pagan messages. like Glee and all the other american sitcoms. we'll see how that works out.

red and gold

tis my 3rd year without those exciting little red packets. i miss the humid days spent fanning oneself and gorging on love letters, peanut butter cookies, honeycomb biscuits then counting the loot afterwards. i miss the money and the food.

talking about a revolution

where is the angry undercurrents, dissenting voices? the fire, the passion! we need some drama here. people walk around like zombies, deadened looks in their eyes, only living for the next pint in the pub. they need life, they need God. they need something to boil their blood and rouse the fire within their lifeless souls! i feel like i'm living in Tim Burton's corpse bride land. where the living are dead, and the dead living. this is a culture in decay, decay because of complacency, loose morals and political correctness. manchester, it looks vibrant but it is really a ghost town.

this rambling post is attributed to the stress of research projects and reading too much elizabeth gaskell novels.

Focus

its all a trick. an illusion. there is a very good magician out there. the illusion that the seemingly pressing issues of today are indeed pressing. see, a good magician knows to distract our attention from the key to the trick. he flutters his hands, there's fire and smoke but its all a ploy to distract the audience's attention. Our attention is constantly distracted by things that are tangible, the TV, deadlines, wealth, property, the social ladder etc.

When really, all that matters is faith in God. Faith that He has planned out our paths. Its funny when you really start trusting God and really taking that cross and dying to yourself, things fall into place.

its when we fall and experience these pesky dips in faith that our attention is diverted. Don't be fooled.

like the song says, Yesus engkau juru selamatku

First day back in uni and already the work is piling on. Went for lunch with friends for a catch-up and they were discussing the tough upcoming semester, placements, work applications and the whole rat race. And suddenly it struck. My God, my Yahweh is so much bigger than all problems. Yeah, i've heard that before, not exactly an epiphany I had, but its was so real that I had to sit back and marvel. Yes, God is my victory dan juru selamatku! Why should I strive and worry like the others when I have a God so strong and faithful?

Life is uncertain but God is faithful. He guides me in paths of righteousness and all my days are in His hands. Enough said.

good things, good people

my last day in the land of eternal sunshine and bliss. and it is so blue, sunny and breezy today.

discombobulated

"Order and method" is what Hercule Poirot always says. That was the foundation of his success. Fictional he may be, but order and method is how Christie wrote her books. Easier said than done though. It is relatively easier for Poirot to make order and method out of facts presented in a fictional world, much more difficult for me living in this chaotic mess where I rely on others to be punctual and responsible.

I hate disorganisation. Disorganisation mind, not tidiness. 2 entirely different issues. Disorganisation is pure torture to the soul. Leave it all up to me and I'd nuke every disorganised person in the world. After all, these creatures are the main reasons for stress in the workplace. But just one of those things you learn to deal with in the working place, no? Perhaps i could devise a way to indirectly punish disorganised people, like laxatives in coffee etc. The simple ones work best.

just a rant. i haven't updated for awhile, and i deserve to start off with a whiny post.